bad bets

I guess it’s time for me 
to stop playing savior 
just because 
I wish someone 
had saved me.
So few people 
actually want to be saved 
at some point,
they felt it was too late 
and started to enjoy 
digging their own grave.
Or at the very least 
it became a habit 
they couldn’t break.
And everybody has their way of coping 
that probably isn’t the healthiest. 
It’s just that some of us 
are dangerously close to going off 
the deep end 
because the thing that once 
helped us cope 
is now making everything else worse. 
As if it’s a metaphor 
for how we can’t even 
save ourselves 
so how can someone else do it?
but that’s the thing about health
and metaphors.
you can put the killing thing
between your lips
to pretend like
you have some sort of control
but the truth is
you can get better 
at any moment
the same way you
could always get worse.
but if you put money
on the likelihood 
that you’ll lose
you become your own curse
with a few loose screws.

You can find the written poem on my blog. — This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app — Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/storiesbynoelle/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/storiesbynoelle/support

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